So now that the “success/failure” struggle is mostly addressed and worked out, time to move on to others. Others that are embarrassingly superficial and yet, still so consuming. Why am I making this information public? Perhaps today is a day for purging. Here goes…

You see, no matter how you cut it, I have shit skin. Blame genetics: I got shafted. Having wasted all of my youth (sigh!) battling this bullshit, I finally decided to go for the hard stuff– Accutane. Bring it on, baby. One of the great things about China: tons of drugs (albeit of questionable purity) available dirt cheap and over-the-counter. For example, a few months ago, I was pleased to learn that the drugstore Watson’s carries emergency contraception over-the-counter! See how the US lags behind in so many ways? My former employer, the Feminist Majority Foundation, is STILL pushing for the FDA to approve ECOTC. Fucking ridiculous, the games this administration plays.

So anyway, I’m on the ‘Tane now, as John calls it. Not the brand name drug, but isotretinoin nonetheless. This shit is like magic poison. The list of side effects is crazy: super chapped lips, dry skin, irritated eyes, nosebleeds, joint pain, bone pain, and bone tenderness. Less common side effects are mood swings, depression, suicidal thoughts, pancreatitis, osteoporosis, and a bunch of internal organ problems. Oh, and then there are the million warnings against getting pregnant. Apparently, the fetus will have serious defects and deformities… Lucky for me, pregnancy isn’t an option: barren womb forever!

So, I’ve been on this stuff for a month or so. My skin is still far from flawless, but I’ve definitely noticed some improvement. John claims to have noticed changes too, namely with my “enhanced” moodiness. Ah well, a small price to pay for better skin. You peeps with good skin man, you have no idea how good you have it. I was practically suffering from BDD, body dysmorphic disorder (which, btw, I learned about from Nip/Tuck). Yeah, we’re talking paralysis, and I’m not using that word lightly. In fact, this whole experience is making me re-examine my position on elective plastic surgery. I mean really, at the point that people are getting braces, veneers, laser surgery, growth supplements/hormones, skin meds, is it really that big a leap to go under the knife?